At some point, someone asked the question, “If you were alone in the woods, which would you rather encounter: a man or a bear?” and for the past few weeks, the online discussion has sparked a lot of interest and engagement. When asked, many women said they would choose the bear and many men expressed confusion and resentment about that response.

This is a hypothetical situation wrapped in an actual situation and both have multiple interpretations based on the imaginations of those discussing it. If we’re to make any sense of both the theoretical and the reality, we have to break it down.

Why was this question asked?

The question could have been an individual’s wonderings or a team of folks from a company. In any case, it was injected into society via our online communities for a purpose. Before we start to explore, it’s important for every member of today’s society to keep an open mind to all the possibilities of what that purpose could be. If an individual assumes they know for a fact the agenda of those asking the question, it may strengthen that individual’s purpose, supporting their answer. Let’s analyze some of these possibilities:

• Innocent curiosity for interesting conversation.
  Inquiring minds want to know.

• Raising awareness of male behavior.
  Some might say the motivation behind gaining the responses is to expose men and the possible danger they could subject women to. Also, if the results and evidence of conducted surveys show men that their possible actions could be immoral or illegal, they could be encouraged, inspired or motivated (others might say guilt tripped, manipulated or controlled) to behave appropriately or do the right thing.
  
  
  
• Stoking a controversial fire to increase activity and engagement.
  Regardless of whether the public wants to believe it or not, there are people all over the world that want money and will do anything to get it. Even if that means purposefully starting divisive, upsetting, aggressive, combative, contentious, antagonistic discussion to drive immersive actions, increased bickering, and intense uproars so that opinionated humans share their various speculative judgments in various methods using online platforms, which subject their eyeballs to advertisements, resulting in more dollars for the company owning the platform.

It’s not up to any of us to determine which of these possibilities is the ultimate truth which may be based on past personal experiences, previous evidence or the obvious human nature that every person can recognize in themselves. What’s important is how any or all of these possibilities apply to each individual’s final determination of of the entire situation. It’s not about the truth, it’s about what you want to believe.

The Hypothetical

A fictional situation is proposed by the question “If you were alone in the woods, which would you rather encounter: a man or a bear?” The answers to this question can vary greatly, depending on the individual. What kind of man? What kind of bear? Does the individual have enough information about each? Has the individual had many experiences with each? The answer to the question is often based on both personal history and a myriad of possibilities.

Maybe the female being asked is only 10 years old, and had mostly positive experiences with men her whole life. Or, she could be 50 years old with mostly negative experiences. Does this particular individual have a vivid imagination? Does she understand the history of male behavior? Most importantly, what does she want to believe? She may have hope that some men are trustworthy, but because self preservation and safety is most likely her primary concern, she’ll probably err on the side of uncertainty and doubt. What percentage of all men have evil motives? Are we to clump all men together and divide them into groups of good and bad or is it plausible that each individual has a percentage of good and bad inside them?

What about the bear? Does the general public know enough about bears? What about the kind of bear? Do people of all kinds make assumptions about bears? Bears are scary. They have sharp teeth and strong jaws that can rip into human flesh. Their claws can make a person bleed out in seconds. Bears are dangerous animals that can attack and kill humans, depending on the situation. If anyone came face to face with a bear in the wild, they would probably assume that they don’t have long to live.

The Comparison

Which do people know more about: Bears or people? Most people are around other people all day, every day. Personally, I have never seen a bear in the wild. I’ve only seen them at the zoo. I assume that most people know more about people than they do about bears.

Bears don’t have the intelligence to be deceitful, humans do. A momma bear will attack for a logical reason: if she thinks her babies are in danger. A human could possibly lure another human with misleading words and actions for many illogical reasons. People know they will die at the claws of a bear, but people don’t know all the sneaky, underhanded and devious actions that a human is capable of.

Why are men compared to such a vicious and dangerous wild animal? There are many men who are rightly infuriated by such a baseless accusation. If a man were see this comparison as unfair, it would make logical sense. What if the tables were turned and men compared women to a particular animal? It certainly wouldn’t be a large, strong animal that uses brute force to kill. Perhaps it would be something smaller and sneakier, like a snake.

If any person were compared to a dangerous, unintelligent beast, I would expect them to be offended to the point of anger, no matter the gender. We all have the potential to be better than that which we are unjustly compared to.

Men’s Response

Some men will challenge the fictitious scenario and the choice women make to take the bear instead of the man. In their minds, they’re nowhere near as dangerous as a bear because they’re not as physically strong, they don’t have sharp teeth or claws. A man’s cognitive abilities are greater than a bear’s and a lot of men suppose they’d do the right thing in most situations.

Certain folks listen to the opposing male response and claim that if a man objects to the woman choosing the bear, it proves that men are incapable of respecting a woman’s right to choose. This, in turn, paints the male as not only a demented rapist, but a power-hungry, controlling, demented rapist, which may pour gas on the fire, infuriating some men even more.

Everything I’ve written here is a man’s response. I could state many of my opinions as fact and I could deny the history of male abuse, or sweep the corrupt and unethical behavior of men under the rug, belittling it so it doesn’t seem so bad, but I won’t. The points I’ve already made could be rebuked and challenged. I could be cancelled and crucified for everything I’ve previously written. Sometimes we have to work things out in our own heads and share the process. How do we grow? By seeking first to understand, breaking things down, and being open to correction, if needed.

The Result

What does this question hope to accomplish? Is there an overall goal? Was there a plan to begin with?

Ask yourself if it’s possible that this discussion could drive men and women further apart. Additionally, ask yourself if that’s the outcome you hope for. Do you want all men to be inherently evil? Will something positive or negative come from the overall discussion? What do you believe?

I’ve known many folks that repeatedly seek out situations where they prove to others that they’re wrong. When they have the opportunity to stand on someone else’s face and elevate themselves by winning arguments, they become elated, delighted and overjoyed. Is that the result of this hypothetical question?

Is it possible that this discussion could be vengeance for the history of oppression?